Sunday, August 10, 2008

Sexy Is as Sexy Does

I was in Starbucks having my second coffee of the day and, before you know it, I'm having a conversation with a woman (in her early to mid 40s) about the weekend. She starts talking about her husband and how they used to do so much together, how she can't get him to do things with her anymore and out comes those dreaded words, "We have no sex life." Now, by nature, I'm a bit of a prude but I'm also a coach so I'm used to attracting people who need someone to listen to them. The convo continued to spiral into how she feels old, unattractive and misses the way things used to be. Finally, I stop her and say "Sexy is as sexy does." She looked at me as if no one had ever said that before and then goes on to tell me all the reasons why she hasn't been able to get her needs met. Again I stop her and say, "Sexy is as sexy does." She says "I know but-" and I said, "No butts. You can put on Victoria's Secret, pull out a whip, and put your legs over your head all day long but if you don't feel sexy doing it, it won't work. To be sexy, you've got to feel sexy and the only person who's responsible for making you feel sexy is you." I then went on to tell her about the 10 Day Power Up Program and how it can have a huge impact on her life and relationships, gave her my card, and she said she'd go to the website. I don't know if she will but it was a reaffirming of a major life lesson.

Here's the major lesson:
We become what we think about all day long. If you want to be the sexiest woman in the room, then be that. If all you want to do is talk about all the reasons why you're no longer the sexiest woman in the room, then you'll be that. Either way, YOU CHOOSE!"

The best part of all of this: She inspired me to do a one night FREE webinar called "How to Be the Sexiest Woman in the Room" on Tuesday, August 19, 2008 from 6 - 8 PM PST (8 - 10 PM EST). If you want to join in on the fun, email me at

1 comment:

Carla Tara said...

I believe that you are in charge of creating and nurturing your belief that you are sexy. If you think you are sexy, people see you as sexy.

This works very well when you walk into a room of strangers, but if you have been married to the same man for 20 years and the communication between the two of you has become flat or non existent, you must learn new communication skills to wake up the passion.

Most couples need to learn how to communicate their needs without complaining with a powerful intention of being really heard and understood without being made wrong or presenting a solution.

Usually the heart of a woman opens up when she feels seen and understood. When her heart opens her sexual energy starts flowing.

Carla Tara
Sex and Intimacy Coach